When someone asks how life is going, what is your first response? For many, it’s a complaint that life is busy, or an acknowledgement that you have a lot going on. Too often, we say that we’re busy as an excuse not to try something new or socialize (though it may not feel like an excuse in the moment, that’s exactly what it is). The feeling of being too busy isn’t a great one. It can fill you with a sense of dread, anxiety, or exhaustion, which I don’t need to tell you is far from ideal!

It sometimes seems that ambition comes with a trade off: a sacrifice of relaxation and peace of mind. Those of us who have big dreams and work tirelessly to achieve them feel great amounts of pressure to be busy and effective, but the problem is a universal one. No doubt this feeling is shared, to some extent, by the man on the assembly line as much as the woman in the corner office.

Have we become busier as a society? Are these feelings driven by an overload of duties, dwindling time for self care, or something else entirely? And how, when our responsibilities are so numerous, can we make time for spiritual and emotional productivity?

These are questions worth asking instead of taking for granted that you will always be busy. It’s true that you may frequently be occupied, but I have a secret for you: You have a choice between the right and the wrong kind of busy to be. No one can make this choice but you!

The Wrong Kind of Busy

According to the BBC, in terms of hours worked and hours spent elsewhere, people today are not statistically busier than past generations. Yet our time has become more valuable, and the pressure to squeeze as much work in as possible, greater. Moreover, the type of work that occupies much of today’s workforce is more intellectually demanding, which economist Sendhil Mullainathan and behavioural scientist Eldar Shafir say creates a problem of “cognitive bandwidth.”

The wrong kind of busy feels the weight of infinite to-dos and buckles under pressure, letting feelings of scarcity impair how we manage our time and commitments.

“The wrong kind of busy dwells more on being busy than it does getting things done”

The wrong kind of busy let’s the time crunch of knowledge work infringe on other areas of life that are no less important: family, spirituality, hobbies, and self-reflection, to name several. Eventually, this type of busy starts to feel normal and may be confused with success.

The wrong kind of busy is often followed by burnout. There’s a simple reason why: being busy means having your plate full, but if you fill your plate with one thing, or something unhealthy, and your body will react poorly before long.

A Plate Full of Great

If you think about being busy like being full, it’s a lot easier to envision the right way to be busy. We all know the importance of a wholesome, nutritious diet. It keeps us healthy and feeling good to consume the right amount of protein, fruit and veggies, and healthy grains. It makes treating ourselves with something sweet even better to know we’ve been consuming food that tastes good and makes us feel good.

“Work will fill your entire plate if you let it”

In our digital world, there will always be emails, meetings, and to-dos, and if you’re not careful they will fill your entire plate, leaving you with little energy to focus on much else besides stress-eating and TV binges. You’ll be a zombie off the clock and a mindless drone on it.

Being busy in a way that is healthy and sustainable means keeping your plate full with life’s other essentials, as well as things that you love and are good for you. Making sure you are fully present with your family when you are off-the-clock is a good way to “get busy” with the people you are closest with. Likewise, scheduling time for hobbies, social outings, and other events that feed your soul will bake in the time you need, alleviating stress.

Don’t forget about ‘me’ time. This is the hardest kind of busy to practice, because if done right it should feel like the opposite of busy. Remember: me time counts because it is productive. Time spent alone to recharge or take special care of yourself will prepare you to tackle more time-consuming tasks with a fresh mind and a positive attitude.

If you truly have too much to do, making me time, family time, and hobbies impossible, that’s what I call a red flag. You need to evaluate your situation to see if it is healthy for you. If work is filling your entire plate, something needs to change — even if you are passionate about it. You need to advocate for yourself and your time. Do this at work, do it at home, do it everywhere you go instead of biting off so much that you choke.

And while you’re on work, it’s worth examining whether the tasks you have are invigorating or merely taxing. One good way to figure this out is to pay attention to whether your work is — at least at times —  giving you energy, or only ever taking it away.

They say if you do what you love you’ll never work a day in your life. Some also say that if you do what you love, you’ll work all the time. I think the truth is somewhere in the middle.

“Maybe the best way of stating it would be to say, if you do what you love (in the right way!) you’ll always be the right kind of busy”

And if you don’t love what you do — maybe it’s time to figure out how to do more of what you love, whether it’s on or off the clock.

Do you think your current job is giving you energy or only ever taking energy away from you? Let’s discuss!